Y2K - The 2010 Edition And My Dependency Problem

Hello, my name is Mandy and I'm an internet-aholic. The first step is admitting that you have a problem.  And I have a problem.

I didn't realize that I had this addiction until the internet (and my home phone) was taken from me suddenly on Monday morning.  Is this some kind of Y2K happening in 2010?  Did someone upstairs not get the memo that they are wreaking havoc a decade too late? 

No one else around us seemed to have issues.  None of my friends here have had any outages or problems with their internet, cable or home phone provider. 

Hmmm, is this a direct attack?  Is someone deliberately trying to sabotage my means of staying connected to the globe, my means of communications? 

Like a mother panics when she has lost sight of her child in the playground or department store, I frantically searched for answers.  Instead I received that dreaded message - "service unavailable". 

Even my husband Kirk couldn't fix the problem.  Kirk - the I.T. guru.  If he were deemed a Greek mythological character, then his name would be something like Panasonic-Microsoft-Zeus-Wireless Router-Poseidon.  All the other Mount Olympus inhabitants would seek advice from him on how to strengthen their power sources for world domination.  But Kirk said this problem was out of his hands this time.

A call to the cable company was made.  What do you mean a technician cannot come out until Thursday?  Seriously?

Okay, okay.  No big deal.  I can do this. 

I've gone without the world wide web, blogging and facebook for several days before, even close to a week.  I didn't have much choice when we moved or lived in a hotel room.  But I was prepared for it then.  I expected it.  I wasn't expecting to go without it this week.  I missed my friend. 

Ya see, my pal "Net" (internet) is who I go to for checking the weather.  Net provides details much quicker than finding the forecast on television. 

Net gives me my daily dose of self-esteem, (a.k.a. quick briefs on celebrity gossip).  No updates on Brangelina or Tiger Woods this week.

Net provides me with directions when I need to visit a new place.  That way I don't have to bother with that Swedish slut named Helga (my GPS) that steers me wrong half the time. 

Net offers me free shipping on books and baby items.  Then I can avoid store lines and public two year old tantrums (Meanwhile, I can browse the online aisles in my underwear). 

Net suggests delicious and healthy recipes for me.  That way I don't have to flip through my cookbooks for substitutions, caloric intake and alternative ingredients. 

Net is my online yellow pages.  I don't even own a phone book in my house.  

Net makes my life easier.  I've grown dependent upon it.  Is there a support group for people like me?  Hi, I'm Mandy and I'm a member of IJA.  Internet-Junkies-Anonymous.  If I don't get my "fix," I will go crazy. 

This is ridiculous.  Why do I need a machine to help me live?  Like the character Morpheus (from the film, The Matrix) says: "Throughout human history, we have been dependent on machines to survive. Fate, it seems, is not without a sense of irony."

The cable technician did arrive this evening, instead of Thursday like originally scheduled.  The problem seems to be resolved, for now. 

But....Is some higher power trying to tell me I need to step away from the internet waves more in 2010?  Perhaps I need to pull the plug, Matrix-style, and kick this dependency habit of mine. 

A more intense focus on family and friends may be just what the doctor ordered. 

After all, everyone around me is falling apart or stressing out.  Kirk is still not feeling well since the car accident on New Years Eve.  He was most recently bitten by a spider (we think) and developed a skin infection that caused his entire knee to swell.  Vivian is having strong emotional outbursts and some behavioral issues lately.  Plus, I've got my own projects that I should be working toward. 

Information overload is on the brain. Goals need to be accomplished. 

So okay 2010, I get your message.  Loud and Clear.  Less virtual dependence and more real-world engaging activities.  At least for now.  So I'm going offline for a little while. 

And maybe, just maybe, when I return, 2010 and I will be friends.  I hope so.  Because right now, I'm almost ready to dump her for 2009 and even throw in the difficult months of 2008. 

But I'll be back. (Terminator style). When I recover, it will be with a vengeance (Die Hard style).