Start Your Own Club

I've spent many years being a member of various organizations.  If I had a dollar for every club or group I have either reasearched or joined, I would have most of Vivian's college tuition saved by now! 

In high school, I belonged to nearly every club or activity that was listed -- student council, dance team, newspaper staff, yearbook staff, prom committee, etc. etc.  By the time I graduated, I was exhausted!  After all those high school social activities,  I took a break in college to focus on academics. 

Then in my early twenties I found online groups and networks to meet friends (and that's how I ended up meeting my husband - you can read our story here! :-)  I also took cooking classes, community aerobics classes, joined a New Neighbors League, and more.  When I didn't have a child, I invited others to join me twice a month for "Cocktails and Conversation" - a social mixer I created with other females to enjoy drinks and discussions after working hours. 

Each time I moved to a new state and city, I looked for clubs, resources, potential friends and networking opportunities.  When I moved to Pensacola, Florida last October (Wow, almost a year ago!), I found an online moms resource site right away.  That online network led me to meeting my very good friend Jen who turned out to be a fellow writer and blogger. Jen invited me to join a moms club that she partakes in.  I knew this was a friendly, great group for me from the very beginning.  Now I volunteer with this moms' organization and I often recruit new people into our club.  Although we have fun activities planned for mothers and children nearly every day of the week, I have now realized that I need another outlet for my creative side, not just my parenting side. 

Jen and I met up recently to discuss our writing desires for the future.  I can't tell you how fortunate I am to have found a local friend who loves doing what I do (writing) and who shares my passion for literacy and exploration.  We both revealed how easy it can be to fall into a funk with creativity and become distracted with the every day parts of life, especially motherhood.  Yet both of us really want to put our pens to paper (errr, keyboards to laptops) and make some serious strides this fall in our writing goals. 

So after talking about our plans over bagels with cream cheese and coffee....because you can't have a meeting without food, am I right?...., we have decided to form our own writer's group.  For now it's just the two of us.  Maybe it will always be just the two of us.  But we're rather excited over it. 

I even suggested a clever name for our club.  Giving it a name makes it feel real and meaningful.  Now we have a funny code word to use for our future gatherings.  It will be casual and flexible but we're both determined to meet once or twice a month to do nothing but brainstorm, write and edit (and eat and drink too, probably.... most likely).

Starting our own club just makes sense since neither of us have found a creative group that fits our needs.  I actually contacted a local writers federation, left messages for them, but no one ever called me back. I've also looked into listings of gulf coast area writers but many of them seem to be a "show and tell" of work already published, not exactly an avenue for aspiring writers who are working on projects, like we'll be doing.


And I LOVE my online blogging community.  It is wonderful.  You are wonderful. I sure do love my readers and commenters.  Yet I realized that I need a live, warm body next to me who can be my writing cheerleader, someone to offer me feedback and editing tips.  Since my friend Jen lives within fifteen miles of me, I know she will help hold me accountable for what I say I'm going to do.  Plus, she's a former teacher so it's perfect -- she'll probably help me develop a lesson plan and give me homework assignments!   :-)  

After our first, impromtu "meeting", I went home and created six pages in my cookbook that I've been slacking on.  I also completed most of my outline for it, spending an hour of uninterrupted time just thinking about it.  I felt such a sense of accomplishment!  I know I should have done this sooner.  I know I've gotten distracted and made excuses.  But I can't go back now.  I can only go forward and really push myself this time --  to keep writing, continue working and focusing in on my creative skills.  The pep talk Jen gave me and our shared aspirations was just what I needed to kickstart me into high gear again.

The reason I'm sharing this here on my blog is to motivate me even further to continue this writing journey.  If I write it here, then I'm adding another level of accountability for myself.  I have to do it.  It's another "challenge" I suppose but not one I'm doing as a monthly writeup.  Rather, it's a life long task of mine.   Plus I wanted to mention it now since I will be distant during the month of October.  After all, I plan to be writing more and blogging less in order to reach my personal deadline for this cookbook.  I finally had to slap my hand with a ruler (old school teacher style) and committ to a due date for the birth of my literary baby.  I hope I don't go overdue.  That would hurt and I don't need side cramps!  ;-)

 I'm curious - Have you ever started your own club? Have you ever formed your own interest/hobby group in order to meet a creative outlet/passion of yours? I'd love to hear about your experiences. Please share them in the comments section.


Hell, it worked in the film Old School right? The characters played by actors Vince Vaughn, Luke Wilson and Will Ferrell started their own fraternity.   Sure it began with drinking and partying but it did give those men a sense of purpose and they formed friendships. 

A club is a club, no matter how you look at it.  If you're gaining something worthwhile by joining one or starting one, then that is all that counts.  If we're having an off day or moments where our creative juices just aren't flowing, I know that Jen and I can just go from the writing club to the cocktails club. And it could be important research for our books anyway, right? ;-)

Book Review: "The Bean Trees"

I've still been reading one to two books per month since my April literacy challenge but I haven't taken the time to review all of them here.  However, "The Bean Trees" by Barbara Kingsolver struck a few chords in me and I wanted to share my thoughts on this novel.   Some of you may be familiar with that author's name.  I reviewed her work "The Poisonwood Bible" which I absolutely loved.  "The Bean Trees" preceded that literary work of art.  In fact, it was Kingsolver's first book. 

I don't typically read more than one literary work by the same author.  That may sound crazy, I know.  Even if I love something written by an author, I usually want to give other writers a chance.  Yet when I nearly ran into this book on the shelves of my local library, the cover caught my attention.  So did the title.  Then I remembered the author's name.  Therefore, I decided to borrow it - thinking perhaps I was destined to read it.

(Funny side note: Kirk has been making fun of me for over a week now, whenever he saw me with the book "The Bean Trees" in my hands.  "Beans on trees? Does the book give you gas?" he would ask in a teasing manner. Or something like that.  Kirk isn't much of a reader, not unless you count instruction guides or electronic manuals). 

The book did deliver but I could tell that it was Kingsolver's first book since it was not as detailed or as well written as "The Poisonwood Bible".  Despite that, she's a great storyteller and covers some heavy subject matter in her novels.

"The Bean Trees" follows the life a girl named Taylor Greer who saves money to leave her small town in rural Kentucky.  She has no intention of turning out like the rest of the females in her community - having babies or being stuck at some dead-end job.  She drives out west with hardly any money or a plan.  While she is making a stop in Oklahoma, a strange Indian woman hands her a baby.  The lady deserts the small child in the back of Taylor's nearly broken down Plymouth.  Taylor doesn't know what to do after the woman disappears but decides to sort the arrangement out later.  She thinks that a long drive will help her figure it out.  She and the child make it into Tuscon, Arizona until her tires give out.  

In Tuscson, Taylor meets Mattie, the owner of The Jesus is Lord Used Tire Shop.  That is Mattie's day job.  By night and secretly, Mattie offers refuge and home to illegal immigrants trying to receive citizenship or escape from their horrible lives in other countries.  (Note: If you have passionate feelings about immigration one way or the other, this novel may cause you to become riled up.  Although it's an underlying part of the story, it's not the main focus in the novel).  Mattie offers Taylor a part time job helping her fix automotives until she can pay to have the tires replaced on her car.

Tucson begins to grow on Mattie.  So does the little girl she surprisingly inherited.  Taylor names her "Turtle" because of her strong grip.  Turtle doesn't seem to say much and acts in shock after a rough, abusive life that she's lived through.  Everyone (including Taylor) wonders if Turtle is a little slow and if she'll ever recover from her past life.  Taylor is astonished to learn that Turtle is three years old after a medical exam, not two like she originally guessed and as Turtle had acted.  Under Taylor's care, Turtle begins to make developmental progress, especially in learning the names of plants, vegetables and seeds, with an affection for beans. 

Trying to provide for herself and this new child, Taylor meets Lou Ann, a recently divorced fellow Kentuckian who lived in a neighboring county that Taylor knew well.   Lou Ann is not much older than Taylor and even has a three month old baby boy named Dwayne Ray.  Soon Taylor moves in with Lou Ann and they form a strong, often comical, friendship. 

While working for Mattie, Taylor meets Estevan and Esperanza, a couple from Guatemala who are in hiding.  When she hears about their personal stories and suffering, Taylor realizes what a sheltered, charmed life she has lived in coming from country life in Kentucky. 

Suddenly everything that Taylor has run away from -- motherhood, small-town living and family become her new livelihood.  She makes these wonderful new friends who teach her life lessons about belonging, abandonment and putting down roots. 

Then comes the threat that Turtle may be taken away from Taylor and placed in foster care.   Her dear friends Estevan and Esperanza are also in danger of being sent back to Guatemala if they don't reach a safe haven located further east.  Taylor reaches within for faith and strength to help this couple.  Then she fights for a child that she originally never wanted or asked for in the first place.

As a mother, I especially loved the conflicts that Taylor had when she was trying to determine if Turtle would be better off in her care or in the hands of someone else.  Those thoughts and questions cross the minds of parents like me all the time, like in this conversation between Mattie and Taylor:

Mattie (to Taylor): "You're asking yourself, Can I give this child the best possible upbringing and keep her out of harm's way her whole life long?:  The answer is no, you can't.  But nobody else can either.....  Nobody can protect a child from the world.....  Instead ask yourself, Do I want to try?  Do I think it would be interesting, maybe even enjoyable in the long run to share my life with this kid and give her my best effort and maybe when all is said and done, end up with a good friend." 

Gosh I really LOVED those lines!  I could so identify with those words.  Even on my toughest days with Viva the Diva, I think.... I'm giving it my best and I chose to share my life with this kid of mine.  Hopefully someday we'll be friends.   Such great, great words that all parents can relate to feeling. 

Later in the story when Taylor and Turtle are looking up a reference book on vegetables and plants, they stumble upon a particular type of bean tree.  Taylor learns about Rhizobia  (referenced as bacteria in the story and as soil in the dictionary) which nourishes the roots of legume plants.  She discovers how the rhizobia is what help sustains the life of a bean tree, comparing them to an underground railroad system that makes the plant survive and thrive.  While reading this, Taylor makes the connection that because of her Tuscon friends like Mattie, Lou Ann, Estevan, Esperanza and others, her own life is now flourishing.  Like the rhizobia helps the bean trees, the people in Taylor's life help create miracles. 

That was the overall message that I took away from this intriguing book.  Even though you sometimes set out to conquer the world on your own, you realize that you can't do it alone.  You need the help of good friends and good people.  And life isn't worth living without those wonderful folks who inhibit it. 

This book has a sequel called "Pigs in Heaven" which I will  try to obtain from the library as well.  In it, the story of Taylor picks up two years later and covers newer subject matter.  I enjoyed "The Bean Trees" so much and I really like Kingsolver's writing style so I'm breaking my rule of not reading the same author once again to see if I can be captured by another one of her novels. 

Kingsolver weaves a wonderful story with endearing characters that you cheer for every step of the way.  I would recommend "The Bean Trees" to anyone looking for a story about friendship, life lessons, family, freedom and social awareness.  I don't think you'll be disappointed by it. 

What are you reading right now?  Anything worth sharing that I should look into? 

Focus

Clear your head
Seize the moment
No more delay


Run, don't walk
Scream, don't whisper
Stop the excuses


Pen to paper
Pedal to metal
Just do it


No hestitation
Pure detemination
Fists clinching


Your secret desire
Could be reality
Make it happen


Less is more
Say it loud
You can transform


Don't slip away
Step up now
Victory is possible


Focus in
Raise chin
Try again.

(Note:  These were a few words and images that poured out of me as I was giving myself a pep talk earlier today.  I'm trying to convince myself to take on a creative project and possibly enter a writing contest.  Let's see if these poetic lines will give me that push I need to get started and to focus on my desires....)  



The Handsome Prince Does Exist

For several days now I have felt like a damsel in distress.  Actually a portrait of the ugly stepsister is a more accurate description of my self esteem and my thoughts lately.  

Well you know.... It happens.  Sometimes, for whatever reason, you have an off week.  Things don't go quite the way you hoped.  You get down on yourself.  Perhaps you look in the mirror and criticize every facet of your external self - I don't like my hair.  My face is covered in blemishes.  I'm getting older and it's showing.  Then all those external insecurities seep into your internal soul and the real damage begins.  You find yourself using phrases like...  I feel like a failure today.  What's wrong with me?  Finally those outer and inner agonies result in things like not paying attention to your child smearing chocolate all over the carseat and bumping into the kitchen countertops for the sixth time causing the cussing and hair-pulling to begin.  And the whole cycle just repeats itself!

That has been my week in a nutshell.  All of those "Negative Nelly" and  "Debbie Downer" thoughts caused me to be an emotional basket case for a few days.  I did a lot of crying on Monday.  On Tuesday, I was cranky and irritable at the slightest thing.  Thankfully on Wednesday I had a small group of friends over at my house.  They helped cheer me up and pass off the day with laughter and stories.  Then last night our family had its usual dinner outing - wings and beers at Beef O'Brady's, our hump-day break from the mundane routine.  I put on a dress, curled my not very cooperative hair and forced a smile.  After all, I wanted to feel better.  I wanted to be out of this funk.

Even though Vivian was a bit bratty during our meal, the evening was nice.  When we came home from dinner, I changed into my comfy t-shirt and boxers.  I placed Viv in front of the television so I could pretend to be a vegetable for a half-hour.   Kirk soon found me though and slipped his arm around my waist.  He gave me the warmest, comforting hug; then he held my chin so I would look at him.  Gazing into my eyes, he told me how wonderful and special I am.  As usual, my husband knows just want to say to calm my nerves and melt away my fears.   Kirk reminded me that he thinks I'm beautiful, even when I don't.  He said that I am great just the way I am, even though I'm getting older and sometimes feel like a failure.   He expressed several reasons why I shouldn't be sad, worried or annoyed with current personal fears and future plans.  My constant gratitude reminder, that's what he is. 

As corny as it may sound, my husband swooped in to rescue me from my tower of darkness.  My prince charged his sword against my negativity and against my self-destructive ways.  When I am weak, Kirk is strong for me.  During times when I can't seem to find the light, he lifts me up and carries me into the sun's rays. 

I'll be honest - I didn't know guys like him existed until I met him.  The boys (and I mean boys, not men) I dated before him were so different, so selfish.  Before Kirk, I had no clue that males could care about others, especially more than they care about themselves.  Was there such a thing?  A man who can love deeply and show love without hesitation.  A guy who is silly, funny, dorky, compassionate, strong, intelligent, handsome, witty and all those things you hope to find for a companion.  Yes, it's true.  It's not just a myth.  I found him.  I have him for my lifelong companion.  How did I get to be so lucky!?  Why is it that I am the chosen one to attend the ball for the rest of my life?  

I wish every person could be fortunate enough to have their own prince charming.  And I realize that the "prince" can be in the form of a man, woman, daughter, mother, son, father, friend or other being.  I only hope that the good people on this earth have someone who lifts them up and makes them feel whole, beautiful and special in the way that I do.  A "prince" may be a rare find but they do exist out there.  They really do.  I know that now. 

But be warned - the prince won't always look like this:

Some may, in fact, look like this:

But my handsome prince looks like this:




And I am one lucky lady!  I love you Kirk!  Thank you for being my knight (without shining armor), my protector, my lover and my best friend.   You're my perfect mixture of Clooney and Shrek with your chiseled chin, your sense of humor and your farts.  My life is much richer, happier and sweeter because you're in it.   I promise to do my best going forward, to be the adoring princess you deserve.  Together, let's live happily ever after.  If anyone can do it, we can. 

(p.s. Happy Birthday on Friday too!  You're one sexy 33-year old fella!  :-) 

Broken Record

Lately my life seems a bit like a broken record.  Here's an example that happened not even an hour ago.

The scene:  Me trying to spend a few minutes of quiet on my computer to read news and check email.  Vivian comes running in holding arms full of stuffed animals and toys, dropping one or two. 

Vivian to me: "Watch Sesame Street!"
Me: "You can go play in your room.  You can read books."
Vivian: "Watch Sesame Street!" 
Me: "I said that you can go play in your room.  How about you find a book to read?  It's not time for TV."
Vivian: "Watch Sesame Street!  Watch Sesame Street!"  (as if saying it twice is going to somehow make me change my mind?)
Me: "I said not right now.  You go play." 
Vivian: "Watch Sesame Street!" 

Then she repeated it about five times in a row.  It's not even 9 o'clock a.m. yet.   

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Here's another exhange that, sadly, also occured this morning and is becoming a more frequent occurence:

Vivian (pointing to a spot on the carpet): "Look, it's poo-poo!"
Me (inspecting the yellow streaked stain): "No, that's Sammy cat's pee pee.  Or puke.  Not quite sure!" 
Vivian: "It's gross!"
Me: "Yes, that is gross.  Guess who has the fun pleasure of cleaning that up?!"
Vivian: "It's part of life."
Me: "Yes, it's certainly a part of MY life these days!"

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While we're driving around town, if we see a helicopter or an airplane (which we often do since we live not far from an airport and Naval Aviation practice fields), Viv will repeat the names of the flying machines over and over again.

Vivian: "Look it's a helicopter!"
Me: "Yes!"
Vivian: "Helicopter!"
Me: silence
Vivian (louder): "HEL....I....COP.....TER!"  
Me (practically shouting): "Yes, it's a helicopter! Wow, yes it is.  What a great observation there!"
Vivian (has to say it one more time and with a big smile on her face): "Helicopter!"

I know this is part of a typical toddler's behavior - to repeat things over and over again untill you say them too.  My daughter needs that reassurance from me that she is correct.  I get that.  I do.  Still, it doesn't make it any less irritating.

---------------------------------------------------

I only wish that I could have some new and improved phrases brought forth into my day.  How about some conversations that go like this:


Hugh Jackman to me: "Mandy, you look wonderful today."
Mandy: "Thank you Hugh, so do you."
Hugh Jackman: "Can I rub your shoulders for you?"
Mandy: "That's so kind of you but my husband does a good job at it."
Hugh Jackman: "Well, he's one lucky man.  You're amazing."

Why can't that conversation be placed on repeat and play back a dozen times throughout the day?!?  I'll place the needle on the record myself.

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Or how about something like this?

Random stranger to me: "Hi Miss, here's twenty dollars."
Me: "Oh no, I couldn't take that from you!"
Random stranger: "I insist!  It would make my day to give this money to you.  And here's another $100 dollars too."
Me: "Well, if you insist...." (takes money and heads toward shopping mall)....

Why can't that be a reoccuring exhange that happens to me on a daily basis? 

Oh well, a girl can dream I suppose.  In the mean time, I suppose I'll jump into the shower to enjoy a few moments (hopefully) without any conversation at all.  I hope to have at least two minutes where the only "repeat" taking place will be the lathering and rinsing of my scalp and hairy legs.

What is an annoying conversation that you find yourself repeating each day?  What is a conversation that you wish could be repeated more often?

The Art of Giving

You know that expression, "It's better to give than to receive."  Well, I'm starting to see the truth in those words, especially the more I put the phrase into practice and also the older I become.   I really do gain a warm, fuzzy feeling inside when I'm able to give a great gift to someone. 

Gifts can come in many forms -- a material object, a physical gesture such as a hug, an intangible reward such as listening or donating time.  I try to give a combination of them all when I can. 

Although I must admit, my favorite presents to offer are those that I can use my creative talents in some way -- either putting together a special assortment of things I know the person will like, seeing a particular item that reminds me of another person or compiling written thoughts/photos/etc. for a special someone. 

Apparently I'm on a giving streak this month, especially this week.  I'd forgotten about my gestures though until I received four notifications from four different people across the U.S. that I shipped presents to.  The recipients all replied You're the best and I love my gift.  And well, I can't help but blush.  I love that feeling knowing I made another person's day!

How do you know when you dream up with a wonderful gift for someone?  When your friends call you crying and are nearly sobbing with joyful tears, that's probably a clear sign.  Well, technically one of them called me full of tears and another one emailed me saying she was wiping away tears.  While I don't like the images of them crying, I know it was for a good reason.  Then, another pal of mine was so touched with her surprise package she received that she apparently is sending me my own (not necessary, but thank you!)  I won't go into the details of each gift or the reason behind each one since they are all personal and were sent for different reasons.  I'll just mention that a few of them took me hours or weeks to put together but it was well worth the time and effort!

Another way you know you selected a great gift is when you receive the following email and photo that reads: 

"WOW, WOW,  WOW, am  I nuts or what??" 

(Ten pounds of salted, roasted nuts given to my dad aka "Buddy" for his birthday)


You're welcome dad!  And happy birthday once again!  You ARE a definite nut and since you love nuts so much, then Kirk and I figured you'd be happy consuming them for weeks to come!  :-)

In addition to all the giving and receiving taking place this week, I also played hostess to a group of moms and their children.  I really tried to roll out the red carpet for my guests too.  On my table was nearly an entire buffet of food choices.  I just couldn't help myself!  

Last week I baked mini loaves for local firemen in honor of September 11th as part of a community service project.  Tis' the season for Mandy to give to others I suppose.  Call me Generous Gina or Hollie Hostess!

All this giving and helping other people really did pull me out of my slump from last week.  Often when I feel  I can't accomplish a goal or if I become too caught up in the mundane, I will stop and remember how I can make a difference.  Usually that difference comes by giving to others, or just by thinking of folks.

Sure a gift card can be a nice gesture. I certainly always put the ones I receive to good use.  Flowers are lovely as well.  Sometimes you can't help but buy a person exactly what they want, especially if it's from a bridal or baby registry.

Still, there's nothing quite like a present where a lot of thought was put behind it, a homemade or creative gift of some sort.  I've been fortunate to receive many of those kinds of gifts in my lifetime and I love passing on the thoughtfulness.

Now, don't be mistaken.  I'm not always this creative or considerate with every single gift I offer someone.  After all, I have confessed to the re-gifting of personal items before.  Heeheehee. 

But I try!   My gift may be late or quirky but there is a reason for it.  After all, I love giving gifts even better than receiving them. 


Do you enjoy giving gifts?  What is one of the best gifts you've loved giving to someone?  Name a memorable gift that you received from someone.

I wish I could send you all a gift right now!  Maybe someday I'll win the lottery and be able to do so. 

Being A Quitter Doesn't Mean I'm A Loser

Thank you all who left comments or wrote to me since my last post on wanting to quit my September challenge.  I really, really appreciate it!  Your sweet, honest words mean a lot.  I've had some time to reflect and I don't feel like a loser anymore. 

I realize that I don't need to give myself or Vivian this "homework assignment" right now.  She has many years ahead of her when that's all she'll be doing anyway and I'll be helping with it then. 


Come to think of it,  Viv and I do a lot in the school of life already.  In fact, several of my friends and my aunt recently told me that I do more on a regular basis with my child than the average person.  They can't believe all the stories I share with them on what we're doing.  Every week I try really hard to expose my daughter to a new thing, new people, new situation and new fun activities.  Plus, she already knows her alphabet letters and the sound that each one makes - she's not even three years old yet.  So I have time to expand her knowlege of letters and vocabulary anyhow.


When I looked back at the past several months, even the last year of our lives, Vivian and I have done a hell of a lot of educational things!  I just didn't write about every single one of them.  Why should I?  I don't need to keep score.  I'm glad I'm seeing that now.


Like many of you said in your responses to my post, I can always tackle this project later.  And if there is something else I'd rather be doing that is more important, then that's really a no-brainer.  Duh! 


So yeah, I'm quitting.  For now.  And I feel better and relieved over it. 


Instead, I spent half the weekend doing a project that I really wanted to do -- taking inventory of my freezer and recipe collections in addition to looking into software programs and publishing sites for my family cookbook that I'm putting together.  The other half of the weekend was spent doing fun things with my family: going to a wildlife sanctuary to visit endangered/hurt birds, eating out a new restaurant and visiting a new park that my daughter enjoyed.  Prior to that, Viv and I visited the library to read books, enjoyed some  water slide play in our own backyard and had a barbecue with friends.  So we're not exactly sitting in front of the TV every day being vegetables, let's put it that way!


I suppose the key point for me is trying to find a balance -- that combination of working toward a goal that makes me happy (like writing, reading, exercising or whatever), spending quality time with friends & family and doing things that help sustain my family (i.e., household duties and upkeep, etc).  The challenge this month wasn't fitting into that balance.   So it's gone now and I'm feeling happier already.  I even had a great yoga workout yesterday that left me balanced and refreshed with a clearer head. 


So to sum it all up, I am a quitter but not a loser.  After all, I'm allowed to make changes, alter my path and set forth most of my own destiny.  We all have that power; we just need to exercise those rights, believe in them and make them happen.  That is a lifelong (not a monthly) challenge for me and one that I intend to always work on and try to improve. 


Besides, do these look like the faces of losers anyway? 

Wait, don't answer that!  :-P 



The diva and I say hello to a hurt, endangered owl at the Pensacola Wildlife Sanctuary over the weekend.




When you get bored, why not play around with the potty seat?  You can teach the following things from it - cleanliness, shape of the seat, color of the seat, and more!  Everything is educational, after all!  :-)

Should I Continue the Challenge?

I have been putting off my September challenge for days now.  I began with the best intentions - it seemed like a good idea in the beginning. 


In fact, I did well with Z, and not too shabby with Y and X.   I even wrote out in a small notebook a dozen or more things that start with each letter of the alphabet.  I already jotted down objects, concepts and ideas for Z to A.  


However, now I'm losing steam and haven't gone past "W" and "V". I technically should be on letter "R" right now according to my calendar.

What's happening?  Why am I considering giving up just ten days into the challenge?


Let me tell you.  And I'll try to highlight the letters W and V in my explanation since I've gone that far in the mean time and I can at least end with a shred of dignity.

First, I'm at my Wit's end with my daughter Vivian.  She will be turning three years old next month and this latest growth spurt has brought out the Worst in her - attitude, meltdown, lots of "no's" over anything and everything.  I'm losing my mind over it every single day, multiple times per day.  I hate saying that about my own child but it's true.  People have Warned me about age three being Worse than age two and I am beginning to believe them.  Sigh!


 I was going to stick it out.  In fact, we had several days of Water play, including a day at the pool and sliding down a Water slide.  We also poured Water into a Vase and pulled a Wagon around the yard.  I Volunteered to make mini loaves of bread and donate them to the local fire stations in honor of their protection and events that took place on September 11, 2001.  In fact, I've been Volunteering a lot lately in my mom's club and in helping out friends.

Then things just fell apart....  The days became a Whirlpool of emotions and behavior issues.  And I was feeling so Wacky and on the urge of Violence all the time.


Okay, enough of all that.  Good grief that is annoying to have all those big and bolded W's and V's just to prove a point-- just like my thoughts on this annoying challenge lately.

Secondly, despite my creative efforts, Vivian becomes disinterested in our activities quickly.  I'm spending more time researching and planning the things we do than spending quality moments acting out the fun with her and with myself.  That is FRUSTRATING for me!  The same goes for writing on my blog about this challenge -- it's taking me longer to explain in words what I'm doing than it does to actually perform the tasks.  Not cool. 

Finally and frankly, I'd rather be walking outside in the fresh air.  At least then I could point out how wonderous the weather is now that it's finally getting a bit cooler these days.  And I'm much happier if I keep my writing open and available for anything I wish to explore.  Lately I've felt pigeon-holded into this challenge, narrowing in too much on the alphabet letters and what to do with them. 

Instead I'd rather focus my energy on something more important and special to me -- like my family recipes cookbook, for instance.  I really want to have it ready to give (and make it available to purchase) as Christmas gifts this year.  I started it months ago and have spent hours trying to find the right software or publishing site that I think will be a match for my needs.  So far, I think I'm going to design it all myself because none of the sites give me the freedom I want to put my pages together.  Now I just need to determine who has the best print quality for an affordable price.

If I could turn back time, I would have made that my challenge for September and October -- to complete my cookbook and self publish it.  Maybe that will be/should be my new challenge instead? 


In addition, I recently looked back at my writing from almost a year ago.  I started an outline for a novel (or play) that I was very excited about last October. I wrote out details on characters and even determined how I wanted the story to end.  Then it sat there, collecting dust.  I've done NOTHING with it. 


What's wrong with me?  Why have I let so many distractions come between me and my true desires?  I was much more determined a year ago than I am now. 

When I first began doing "Mandy's Monthly" challenges, back in March, I did them because I had certain goals I wanted to attain -- lose weight, run a 5k, read more books, put more literacy into my life, expand my mind, etc.  They were great and I enjoyed them.  At that time, I felt I needed that something extra in my life.  

Since then I have tried to come up with something as close to my heart as what I've already done.  So far, that hasn't happened.  I wanted to give it another try and now I'm regretting it. 

When I came up with the notion of September's alphabet challenge, I didn't clearly think it through.  The concept was a good one but deep down, my heart hasn't been in it after that first day of brainstorming.   And if my heart and soul isn't in it, why should I keep doing it?  I'm not being paid or forced to continue this trial.  If I don't think it's worthwhile, then why bother with it?

Although I feel like a loser for wanting to give up, my gut is whispering the following lyrics into my head, "Know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em.  Know when to walk away and know when to run."   I suppose the greatest challenge for me is being too hard on myself and knowing when to move on. 

What do you think?  If you were me (not that you'd want to be), would you continue the challenge?  Have you given up on a challenge before because you thought it was the best thing to do? 

Wondering Mind Wednesday

This image taken from - http://www.gapingvoid.com/iwonder883.jpg

Isn't the above cartoon funny?  I find it so true too.  At least that's how I feel.  Somedays I wonder where my creativity goes and when it's coming back.  It really annoys me.  However, I think that probably no one else really cares about it except for me.

I just can't seem to find time to sit and write these days (or read much either).  I hate that.  I really need to add it to my to-do list -- Make time to read and write for thirty minutes, or even just fifteen minutes each day.  It would be so good for my creative soul. 

I've been keeping up with my alphabet-letter challenge for September but I don't want every single post to be just about that.  I'll probably do some weekly recaps on what Viv and I do instead. 

Since my head is all over the place at the moment, this blog post might as well show where my wondering thoughts are too.  Here is my wandering mind on this Wednesday and the questions that arise in my head:

• Why is it so much easier to say "No" than it is to say "Yes"? I'm so tired of my two year old (almost three year old) saying "No" over every little thing I say or ask her to do.  I'm trying my hardest not to use the word "no" anymore. And guess what?  It's really hard!  I'm working my brain to stop, pause and say something like "Let's do ___ instead of what you're doing." Or I just try to distract her with another activity, thought or item. It's so much easier to talk about it then it is to practice it! Why can't I be like Jim Carrey in that Yes Man film?

Why can't the people in my household use the word "Yes" instead of "No" so often?

• 
  
  Why does our baby monitor (Yes, we still use it and my daughter is almost three.  Sad but true.) remain on and quiet all day long; then at night when we actaully need to use it-- when Kirk and I are going to sleep, it suddenly becomes a full-on country music radio station (my least favorite type of music, by the way) and have voices that resemble the actors and scenes from the Smokey and The Bandit film?  I do not need Burt Reynolds trying to talk to me while I'm hoping to achieve beauty rest.

• 
  
  Why do I let a few pimples bother me so much?  I'm not in junior high anymore.  Yet a few red dots around my forehead or chin and I become this awkward teenager again.  Why should it get to me?

• 
  
  Why do I love having so many books around me when I don't always make the time to read them all?  The same thing goes for movies.  When will I watch them?  Or am I just a collector?

• 
  
  How come knowing the history of a person, an artwork or any object makes it more special to me?  The other night I watched the behind the scenes footage of the film Alvin and the Chipmunks.  It told the incredible story of how the creator came up with the idea for the chipmunks and about how his career took off.  After watching this, I had such an appreciation for those furry creatures and their mastermind. 

I loved learning how Alvin is based on a real chipmunk that creator Ross Bagdasarian saw on the road while driving!

• 
  
  Why do I think of ways to help others but rarely put them into my own life to help myself?  This goes from the small things to the larger aspects in life. 

• 
  
  When will I get to travel someplace fun again?  I'm wishing that I could plan an adventurous trip right now, somewhere further than an hour from my house. 

• 
  
  Why do people spend a lot of money on lingerie and nighties?  It comes off so quickly anyway.  I suppose it may make some folks feel sexy.  But, isn't naked better and more to the point? 

• 
  
  Why can I sit there and eat an entire bowl of peanuts or chips with dip in one sitting?  Why can't I be that way with carrots or broccoli? 

Leave me alone - stop calling out my name!

• 
  
  Why does that librarian in the children's section of our local institution look so incredibly scary?  She looks like she cannot stand children and even does these strange voices that seem to say, "fear me" not "like me." 

• 
  
  Why won't my dog stop eating his own poop?  And why must my cat puke on the carpet every single time - why not the tile floors that are easier to clean? 

• 
  
  Why do I always have so many questions in my head?  When am I going to realize that the questions are what matters, not the answers? 

What is your mind wondering about today?  I hope you're having a good week! 

Y - X - Discoveries from September's Challenge

Although this alphabet-inspired monthly challenge for September isn't easy, I am realizing that I do like researching new things and using my brain to come up with an object, activity, song, concept or craft about each alphabet letter.  I usually enjoy the quest just as much as I do the end result. 

Plus I'm finding some rather fun tools that I can use with Vivian and that may help other parents (or teachers).  The internet is such a great avenue for education.  Like this website I found that has coloring sheets you can print out for each letter of the alphabet - http://www.my-coloring-pages.com/alphabet-coloring-pages/.  There are TONS of resources like this out there if people would only look for them. 

Maybe that should be a job for me -- Research Professional.  Do jobs like that exisit?  Hmmm, maybe I'll look into that when I get to the letter "R." 

Anyway, these were the discoveries for letters Y and X.  They are not quite as extensive or creative as the letter Z findings.  Yet I give myself credit for keeping up the challenge, especially during a Labor Day, long holiday weekend when most other folks are relaxing or vacationing. 


Y-Things That Vivian and I Did Together:
-We ate Yogurt, blueberry flavored. 
- Viv and I pointed out a few Yellow-colored items around the house.
- We sang the song, "Yakety Yak (don't talk back!)"
- We colored a picture of Yarn and a Yak.
- Viv and I looked at images of a Yaht.

Y-Things I Was Curious About and Looked Up For Myself:

- What the heck is a Yin and Yang anyway?
- I also researched a little bit about Yoko Ono especially since I saw her quoted recently in the Associate Press.




A Recent, Little Known Y-Fact About Me:

For the past few weeks, I've been getting into YA (Young adult) novels and literature.  Since my niece Kristen came to visit us and I took her to the library to browse books, I find myself skimming the youth book shelves when I take Vivian once or twice a month.  Of course it doesn't hurt that the teenager/tween section is right next to the children's section.  I find YA appealing because right now I don't have a lot of time to read lengthy, complex novels geared toward my age.  The YA books are shorter, faster and still relative to me as I will oneday have a young adult to deal with anyway. 

Over the weekend, I read a young adult book that is so unlike what I would normally read but I actually enjoyed it.  The book is called "Finding Your Faith" by Stephanie Perry Moore.  I didn't realize it when I borrowed it but the book is actually part of a series.  Each story is focused on a thirteen year old black girl trying to make sense of her older brother's death while dealing with the teenage angst of school, friendships, sibling rivalry and more.  The young girl is named Yasmin Peace (ironically, just in time on my Y-day too!) and I like how she thinks and talks.  It may seem crazy that I'm reading about a girl half my age and who has completely different skin color.  Yet something about the book drew me in and I'm glad I chose to read it.  I think it's wonderful to read about a person, place or story that is totally different from your own upbringing and community.  I would recommend the story to others and may look for her other books as well.


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X-Things That Vivian and I Did Together:

-We watched a video demonstrating how X-ray paper works.  It's actually a very short, cool film: http://www.funmansion.com/videos/xray_video.html
- We colored a picture of a Xylophone. 
- We played treasure hunt and found an "X" that marked the spot. 
- We watched a video and listened to the song "Xanadu" by Olivia Newton-John

I could not think of any interesting x-facts about myself or Vivian to share.  X is not an easy alphabet letter to get x-tremely detailed over! 

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I had written down several other ideas for Y and X but just didn't get to them this weekend (such as the x and y chromosomes, famous people named Xavier, Xerox machines, yams and yodeling).  So I will save them in my notebook in case I should ever revisit this project/challenge again at a later time with Vivian.

So, that's all we did for X and Y.  Vivian and I were slacking a bit since we did have friends over visiting and stayed busy with some family fun.  W and V are looking to be more promising and entertaining anyway.

I hope everyone is enjoying the long, Labor Day holiday weekend!

Z - Discoveries from September's Challenge

As I shared in my last post, I'm starting up my monthly challenges again.  For September I'm going "back to school" by teaching, learning and sharing.   I'm making up my lesson plans as I go and taking my "classroom" outside and on the road.  I'm working hard by teaching my daughter Vivian new things, by learning new concepts for myself and then sharing them here on this blog. 

Today I began backwards with the letter Z and intend to go all the way to the letter A with fun activities, words, songs, crafts, and more!  Whatever I can dream up and accomplish!  Here's how our first day with the letter Z went:

Z-Things That I Taught Vivian:


- Zoo: My daughter and I went to the local Zoo to explore. I'm suprised I have enough energy left over to even write this post!
- Zippers: Viv and I both wore Zippers on our clothing and practiced Zipping them up and down.
- Zig-Zag: We walked in Zig Zag patterns at the Zoo and in our backyard.
- Zester: I showed Vivian how my Zester works, demonstating with a lemon.
- Zumba: We watched a video on Zumba dance moves and practiced them. 
- Zebra and Zucchini:  We colored a picture sheet of a Zebra and a Zucchini.
- Ziploc: Viv and I played with Ziploc bags.
- Zippity Doo Dah: I sang this Zippity Doo Dah song to Vivian.  She laughed.


Interesting Z-Facts About Me:

-I loved going to the Zephyrs baseball games when I was growing up. They are the amateur baseball team in New Orleans. I have a lot of fond memories going to the ballpark with friends and family members, even the one where formosan termites were flying everywhere and they nearly postponed the game!

- I once dated a guy that had a "Z" scar/ birth mark on his back. He used to joke and say that he was Zorro. I like to think that somebody made a mistake because it should have been an "L" for Loser.

- I do not understand people's fascination with Zombies (or vampires for that matter).  I just don't get it.  This type of fantasy does not peak my interest at all.  I'm not hip with the current times, I suppose.

- I used to love drinking Zima.  Now that alcohol is too weak for me!  ;-) 

- I love using Zatarain's box mixes.  They are made in Louisiana and are great starter seasonings for Jambalaya, Dirty Rice and more! 

Z-Things I Learned:
I was curious about my Zodiac symbol and meaning so I researched it.  Here's what I found:

My element: Fire
My ruling planets: The Sun
My Symbol: The Lion
My stone: Peridot
Life Pursuit: To lead the way
Vibration: Radiant Energy
Leo's Secret Desire: To be a star

My Zodiac Description:

Love triumphs over all for this sign, which is ruled by the heart and operates from this dimension too. Leo's are born fortunate. Charismatic and positive-thinking they attract not only an abundance of friends and opportunities, but manage to survive life's stormy times with style and good humour.


Once a Lion is committed to a relationship, they are totally devoted and faithful. Should their heart or trust be broken they never forgive or forget. When a relationship breaks down (even a long standing one) they can disappear into the sunset without a backward look. Leos can cut ties, and leave others heartbroken, but usually there is a good reason why they have broken a trust. For a Leo, when a relationship is over, really over, it is over for good.


Leos are trendsetters, leaders and adventurers. Their weakness is their pride. This is one sign where the saying "flattery will get you everything" applies, but be warned criticism will slam the relationship door right in your face.

Fun stuff!  Some of the above seems true and other parts don't exactly fit me.  But I loved reading about Zodiac my sign.  Now if some random person ever asks me, "Hey, what's your sign?" then I can give them a mouth-full response!  ;-)



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I also decided to look up information about an interesting actress/singer named Zooey Deschanel. I've liked Zooey since I first saw her appear in the Cameron Crowe film Almost Famous. I remember hearing her sing in the movie Elf with Will Ferrill thinking that she has a great voice. Then when I saw her sing again in the film Yes Man with Jim Carrey, her quirky, weird lyrics stuck in my head for days.


There is something attractive and appealing about her as a performer. I discovered that she is named after Zooey Glass, the male protagonist of J. D. Salinger's 1961 novella Franny and Zooey. I haven't read that work of Salinger but I did read The Catcher in the Rye and reviewed it on this blog.


Zooey is also a member of a band called She and Him. I watched a few of her musical performances and videos on youtube.  I particularly liked this one:





I will be looking for her album soon.  I really enjoy Zooey's music. 

So that's all I have for the letter Z, when it comes to Vivian and me.  Today was just the first day using letters; therefore I set out to accomplish a lot and kick things off with a bang (or Zang I should say?)  I might not always do this many activities. I most likely will not always be this creative either.  However, I'll do my best and keep trying....


Zat's it for now!  :-)

Mandy's Monthly: September 2010 Challenge-- Teach, Learn and Share

Everywhere you look you see "Back-to-school" signs and slogans.  And why not?  School is back in session.  Summertime play is over and it's time to be a student again.

The same goes for me.  I've taken a four-month break from my personal challenges that I started back in the springtime.  In March and April I pushed myself in new ways.  Although it wasn't easy, I felt better completing those monthly goals and pushing myself to do more than the ordinary. 

The time is now to get serious again.  I've been feeling like a lazy human being for the past few weeks.  Vivian and I are both annoying each other lately.  She's been acting out quite a bit and I find myself ignoring her more.  That's not good!  We need to shake things up again in our routine!  Tonight after an enlightening conversation with my husband just before dinner, I came up with a plan to revamp "Mandy's Monthly" again.  I'm kicking things off with a September "Back to School" challenge for myself - to teach, learn and share.

I must admit that part of the inspiration for this challenge came from my friend Jennifer who is a former teacher.  She has a wonderful blog here in Pensacola where she is sharing ideas on how to teach your child at home, called "Learning Time Monday."  She just shared this post on learning about the letter "A".  Jen is doing a week long session about the letter A this week. 

I'm not sure I can (or want) to do one alphabet letter for an entire week like Jen is doing.  But I love her idea of going through the A-Z letters to teach your child new things.  So my plan is to go through the entire alphabet in one month, during this month of September.  I will find new things and activities to share with Vivian and myself almost every day of this month. 

However, instead of starting with A and going to Z, I'm going to do it backwards.  Why not, I mean most of what I do is completely bass ackwards anyway?!   Just ask my closest family members and friends!  ;-) 

Tomorrow I'm starting with Z and planning to take a trip with Vivian to the local Zoo.  I hope that seeing all the animals and being outside will encourage me to think of what to do next for Y, X, W and more..... because I'm making this up as I go along....

This won't just be about kids activities though!  (Don't freak out - I'm not turning this into a homeschool site!)  No, part of the challenge will also be to apply the learning to myself - as a 32 year old woman (wife, mom, writer, etc.)  What can I learn?  What can I teach myself?  What new things can I share with others?

By doing it this way, I can't copy off my friend Jen.  I would like to but that would be too easy and this should be a challenge, right?!  I'm not a teacher like her.  I often don't feel like teaching, talking, playing or even doing a damn thing with my daughter or with myself. 

So that is why this is a challenge for me!!  The closest I've come to teaching was being a substitute for four hours at my mom's school after I graduated from college.  (My mom was a teacher for 30 years -- I have no idea how she did it!!)  Those four hours of substituting were nearly the longest hours of my life!  They consisted of fourth graders - nine year olds acting like thirteen year olds when they were really just babies who could barely make it the bathroom on time.  No thank you!  Not for me. 

I'm also vowing to spend LESS time on social media outlets (like blogging and facebook, etc.) this month so that I can dedicate the time to fulfill this project.  When I looked at all the minutes and hours I was spending on the computer, it really disgusted me.  Instead I'm going to restrict my time or "treat" myself whenever I want to learn, read and receive inspiration. 

Therefore, this is going to be tough!  Less reading about my friends' updates and more focused on ways to make 26 days out of this month all about the 26 alphabet letters; then devise a plan to make it fun, educational and cheap (or better yet, free).  Uh-oh, I may be in serious trouble! 

I'm going to write about my progress and take a few photos here and there.  I can't promise that I will write here everyday.  (But I will keep a small hand notebook where I write about the things we do).   However, I can promise that I will share weekly updates, condensed versions of my plan and cool insights that Vivian and I discover along the way.

I'm looking forward to this new challenge.  I need it!  Vivian does too, I can tell.   We both need to step back and reconnect with each other the way we did when we first moved to Florida and were out exploring our new community.  This will be good, for both of us.

I think I'll even grade myself at the end.  Hopefully I'll achieve an A or B merit.  That wouldn't look good if I flunked out of my own challenge.

So let the learning begin.